Many years ago while I was back and forth, in and out Greece, I met a guy. We worked together as baristas in a Cretan village cafeteria. I was serving coffees, he was making them, I was pouring drinks to the locals that were homies there and he was chatting with them. Slowly he started to flirt with me as I was seductively wearing my dresses of sophisticated East European girl. I played a little cold but afterwards I responded to his infatuation. We started to go out together although I knew he was dating another local girl. Soon she dissapeared and we let ourselves carried away by those summer nights heats. We spent a very nice time together, going out for dance, food and drinks after work. In September my stay was over for that year. I had to go back to my country to finish my last year at the university. It’s been painful to let him there on the peer but still I had the comfort of the feeling that our story wouln’t end there. We kept in touch for the whole time until I went back to Crete. It was like finding my man after only a fews days since I left the island, warm, familiar, caring and responsible of his mature and deep feelings for me. He got a day job in town and was helping me find one for me, more serious. I still was flirty and behaved seductively although I didn’t mean it. One evening, we were out with some friends and I got a phone call from a guy that we both knew, from his village and a customer of the cafeteria we used to work together. I really can’t remember how he got my phone number but I remember my talking to that guy wasn’t on my sweetheart taste. I felt embarrassed and didn’t really understand why I was sending twisted messages to people. It wasn’t my intention to have a flirty chat or to upset my guy. On the spirit of last summer I felt like being open, nice and warm. I didn’t even like that guy that called. We had a pleasant evening and nothing seemed to spoil our days to come together. We said good night as we normally did. I got a job at a hotel the following days and as I hadn’t have any news from him I called. The number I dialled was unreachable and never got any phone call from him or saw him ever again. The community was small and once I worked in a very popular beach bar for a couple of days. I found a bottle of whiskey that had a post it with his name on it and asked my collegue who was it for. His answer confirmed that it was about him. He was there one night before with his friends and didn’t drink the whole bottle so they had kept for him. He didn’t come back in any of the days I worked there although I secretely wished for. Needless to say how many times I had tried to reach him that summer. Never met him or anyone to give me any detail about him or our story. He left me as we had never been together. Vanished. Dissapeared. The last night we were together he confessed he loved me and that he loved me from the previous year. I don’t remember how long after, might be that autumn or next year when I found out from Katerina, the owner of the cafeteria that he married the girl he was with when I had first met him. She must haved loved him a lot and she deserved him more so that the Universe gave him to her so silently that I’ve even asking myself if it was real. The memory of that story is bitter sweet in my mind, that summer, ease and confidence of everlasting life together.
I couldn’t understand why this happened and especially why had it had to be that way. I carried on, suffering in silence and didn’t even have the chance to revolt myself against it. I was just witnessing what the other decided for him, forcing me to summon myself to his decision without the right to have a say. Somehow I buried all my feelings and resentment for all these years. My memory still wander on deserted streets of that Cretan town, looking for his silhouette in the dark, hoping to get a glimpse of the truth and of what has become of him.